Monday, May 2, 2011

Feelin Lucky

Today, my baby turned 5.  UnBeLiEvAbLe.  I never saw myself getting here this fast.  I know, I know everyone said it would come.  Years ago, when I was hunkered down in the trenches with a 5yr, 4 yr, 18month old  and a newborn all at the same time, sanity looked so far off in the distance, that it was difficult to imagine this time.  Its here.  In the fall, all four will be in school.  Today, I took him out to lunch to his favorite place and we stopped to get a treat.  I was looking for the right moment to begin my "5 year old, step 2 adoption discussion".  We are at step 2.  When they are 4, I discuss the word adoption with them and keep it simple for most of that year.  At 5, I ask them what they think adoption is, based on their years experiences.  He did pretty good with his explanation, which tells me that he has been absorbing our talks.  Here's how it went.....

I asked, "So, Benny, do you understand what the word adoption means?".  He said, "yes, it means that you growed in a different mommy's tummy and when she woke up she asked God to call you and tell you that I was ready".   Is that stink'en adorable or what?   He goes on to say, "I sure am glad that you said yes, four times Mommy, otherwise, I wouldn't know where I was." 

This year, he will start to ask more detailed questions about his adoption.  I always keep it simple.  I only answer the specific question and I don't elaborate.  That's tough for me, since I over explain everything.  So I'm told. (lol) 

As most mom's do, I have spent his birthday making googlie eyes at him and realizing just how fast he is growing up in this big family, and how lucky Jerry and I have been to have Benjamin in our lives.  I can't help but to reminisce the days when, I thought that none of this would come to be.  It is a privilege to have these children.  They are so precious to us. 

Benny is 5 today

It saddens me so much when I read blogs written by adoptees who were not adopted into the ideal situation.  I want to reach out to them and make it better for them, but I realize that I can't, support and love is all one can offer.  They have their own journey.  Every child deserves love and a family.  If you know adoptees that are on a journey to find their answers, please help them.  Reach out to them with love.  They haven't had the support system that they deserved.  One person can make a difference in a life, no matter how small the gesture. 

If you are a adoptee searching for peace in your heart and mind check out this site.

Sherrie Eldridge: Your Adoption Coach
http://www.sherrieeldridge.com/sherrie.cfm

Sherrie is a passionate educator and advocate for individuals and families who have been touched by adoption. Her tireless efforts to inspire other adoptees by sharing her own personal journey illustrates her strong Christian faith and extraordinary character. We need more voices like Sherrie's to join in the effort to spread awareness for the uniquely complicated emotions and relationships embodied in the adoption triad.

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