Mommie or Bust ~ A Mother’s Journey Through Adoption

Boy, that's the truth. As an adoptive mother of four, I have learned through my journey that, the hardships along the way towards your dream, not only are all part of what completes the journey, but what makes the journey worth it.  Adopting children is a LONG journey. It's a never ending life lesson, full of blessings, rock bottoms and amazing surprises you can't fully grasp unless you DO it. You cannot anticipate what it will bring when dealing with their emotions about being adopted. Mine are 13, 12, 9 and my little guy is 7. We have experienced many phases now of kids feeling their way through being adopted. ...as well as our emotions as parents. There have been many a stormy path, but most of our storms end with a rainbow of growth, understanding and acceptance, by the Grace of God. People ask me if I think girls or boys are harder to navigate through the roller coaster of emotions. I tell them, I think it's more about the type of kid rather than the gende...

My daughter is now 8 and a half. I have told her from day one, where she came from. Every time, she would shake her head at me and say, "no mommy, no".  I kept at it, as always.  Recently, the dam broke. Out poured every why? What? Who? And When? that had ever crossed her mind. Of course this was at 10:30 at night. Way past her bed time. But.....now, was the moment that an adoptive mom waits for. The moment that they let their guard down and accept in their heart just what you have told them time and time before. But today, she stopped rejecting the fact that SHE WAS ADOPTED.  Today, she wanted all the answers. I was prepared for such a moment, as I had been through it two other times with my two older boys. This time was different though. She is a girl and had dealt with the information differently than the boys had. Each experience has been a very unique experience. I will discuss more about the boys in future posts. My daughter was mostly upset about an idea she h...

Welcome to my story. I hope you laugh, cry or maybe find comfort here. Sharing my story has been healing for me. It has brought me amazing joy to share it. For now, I am going to stop here. The story is still unfolding. I will be back. If you are new here, please share this with anyone who is struggling with infertility, planning to adopt, or just needs a good "happy cry". Begin with January 2011: Where it all began. in the Archives.

With all the talk of New Years resolutions, it got me thinking about what changes did I need to make around this crazy houseful of kids, hubby, cocker spaniel with a Mommy who seems to be waving the white flag of surrender....quite often. Still battling my leftover wounds from a car accident, I find it almost impossible to accomplish things the way, "the old me" did. It is an uphill battle everyday. We have had a busy Christmas break and thankfully, here at the end, our parents offered to take the kids for the final weekend before everyone goes back to school and work. It is SO quiet around this house. I can actually here myself think. Hubby and I have enjoyed old John Wayne movies, sleeping in and having full control of all the remotes in the house. Heck, we even know where all the remotes are. Lol. I find myself, even though am enjoying the absence of Chaos, thinking about the kids and what they might be doing. As I scan my fridge, I see the goofy looking Santa...

This is Love Kris Kroeker 2005 dedicated to my child's birthmom I know you love me You loved me from the start I know that you want the best for me I know this because you made a plan for me A plan so I would grow up with my mom and dad A mom and dad you knew would love me as much as you do I know it tore your heart apart to make this plan for me I know it hurt when you put me first I know that you feel the pain of empty arms I know that my pictures are spread across your walls to try and fill the hole You need to know that I was hurting too I felt the loneliness I felt the emptiness when my new parents held me When you were gone When I couldn't hear your familiar voice I was too little to put it into words, but I cried out for you I wanted YOU to hold me I wanted to hear YOUR voice But it didn't work that way Life gave me hurt and loneliness But you knew that your plan was good And that your love was bigger than the pain It would have been so e...

I know that when you are waiting for your time to come for finally becoming a mother, every day can seem like an eternity. Try to remember that there in no ticking time clock on becoming a mother. Motherhood knows no age. When you become a mother, it is forever. If, you don't lose heart through your waiting, your dream will come true. Embrace the journey. It is part of developing the kind of mother you will be. One who will appreciate the honor of motherhood.

When the world says, "Give up," Hope whispers, "Try it one more time."